Fighting ignorance with bliss since '76
Me : What's with the increasing need to pee the closer you get to a toilet? Is there an equation for this? Him : Bladder fullness / distance squared, I believe if you intersect, you divide by zero and the universe ends. Me : The universe can never end because it never started- nothing can come from nothing, silly billy. Him : You can't prove it didn't! Me : I can't prove it didn't what? Him : You cant prove the universe didn't begin! Me : Yes I can Him : D: This changes everything I ever believed. Me : Hold out your hand in front of you. Him : Okay, I am doing that Me : What happened? Me : You may need to type one handed Me : Did it happen yet? Me : The suspense is killing me... Him : I'm alive, there was just cake! Him : I held my hand out, it got tired, but someone put cake in it. Me : I have failed. I was trying to prove that when you held out your hand nothing would come from nothing. It turns out I was wrong. Cake can come from nothing. I bow to you, Sir. Thank you for showing the folly of my ways. Hear me when I proclaim "The universe is cake. Let them eat universe!" Him : My work here is done! Pajamais vu; It's when you've been asleep, but don't feel like you've slept at all
If there is nothing so hidden as someone else's problem, why I am always in the spotlight?25/8/2014 You raise my hopes, then dash them, like so many charged glasses into the fireplace of despair19/8/2014
I'm sick of saying the same compliments all the time- "You look nice today (what, so I look crap the other days?)" "I like your earrings (oh, they distract from my hideous face?)"- anyway I'm just going to trial some new compliments, like: "You throw away the most interesting things." and (when encountering someone leaving a toilet stall) "Your poop smells like a rainbow." See if I can spread my joy, like measles in a cinema.
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About the authorLouie is not as smart as he is tall, less sensible than he is bearded, and as green as he is blue. Archives
August 2016
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