I pushed a wrong button on my mobile phone today and Stephen Hawking told me quite loudly that I had no missed calls. I didn't know whether to be thrilled that Stephen Hawking lived in my phone, or to be sad that he knows that I have no friends... The non-Stephen Hawking voice in my head seems to think everybody already knows. Clouds- Thermodynamics is crazy. It's basically the field of physics that studies the movement of heat between objects.
A cloud is a massive collection of miniscule water droplets or ice crystals. All air contains water, but closer to the ground it is in the form of a vapour. When warm air rises it expands and cools, and cool air can't hold as much water vapour as warm air. Some of the water vapour condenses and attaches to tiny dust particles floating in the air. When billions of these droplets come together they become a cloud. Yay! Yesterday someone said to me, "Hey Gorgeous. Do you work hard to get a body like that- because I would." I told Mum that she was creeping me out and that she should get down out of the tree and take my undies off her head .
Dear Secret Valentine,
Thank you. Thank you for making me feel special. Thank you for the anonymous comments on my Facebook page about my dress sense to let me know my fashion faux pas. Thank you for getting my clothes off the line the other day- I assume you’re mending my undies and they’re coming back... Thank you for your aloof company while I shop. Thank you for watching me while I sleep to make me feel safe. Thank you for going through my bins to make sure I’m eating right Thank you for bugging my phone and for calling me a few times a night only to discretely hang up when you find out that I’m still alive. Thank you for videoing my bathroom so I know that I’ll be found if I slip and hit my head in the shower. Thank you for cutting out pictures of my face and pasting them over the magazine people in the work tea room to make me feel loved. Your devotion has not gone unnoticed. The Buddha says :
“There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth- not going all the way, and not starting.” Not to be a Negative Nancy, Mister Buddha (if that is your real name) but One isn’t on ‘the road to truth’ if One doesn’t start. That would be like saying I’m on the road to the supermarket while I’m sitting here at my keyboard, which isn't the truth at all. Also, One's truth is not always the actual truth. There is a matter of perspective involved (my version of events may not be the same as another person’s), and, even if we forget all that parenthesised 'perception is reality' rubbish, a poorly delivered truth can be far more harmful than a lie. So, Brothers and Sisters, before you get in bed with the truth, perhaps you should find out what it really looks like rather than believing its facebook profile picture, and be sure of what its intent is before the two of you go ‘all the way’ . |
About the authorLouie is not as smart as he is tall, less sensible than he is bearded, and as green as he is blue. Archives
August 2016
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